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Paul Perrone's avatar

A lot to digest here...and a lot before I was a subscriber. Trying to understand this new dynamic since I'm from a different generation and have been married over 44 years and never divorced. I agree with the attraction information, women have always been attracted to status, power, etc. But when married while those qualities remain important, men need to value loyalty and commitment. And as I have pointed out many times here, parents need to be involved in their children's selection of a spouse not only because this is charge from God, but because it will affect them too. Leaving children to figure it out on their own is a recipe for disaster usually.

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JonF311's avatar

There is a huge problem with this approach: Most men aren't and can't become

alpha men"-- just as most women are not, and won;t become, "alpha women" So to some extent the advice here rather resembles someone advising a debt-burdened person to win the lottery or inherit money from a rich uncle.

What is needed is some hard talk with women: Most of them have no chance of snagging a rich guy just as most guys have no chance of snagging a gorgeous beauty queen. In the not so distant past (and for many centuries) families and communities did their best to steer young women away from flashy cads of the love-em-and-leave-em type and toward men who would make good husbands. Of course people are fickle and enough women made that kind of mistake to serve as cautionary tales. Somehow we need to duplicate that wisdom today too. At least among committed Christians the churches could help in this area-- as can families even if they don't have the authority they once did.

Some years back Megan MacArdle wrote a column advising women who were no longer quite so young that they should resign themselves to settling for Mr. Good Enough since most of them would not land a Prince Charming.

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